Tuesday, July 13, 2010


Drats! My grand plan to grow old gracefully is being thwarted. Roadblocks are being thrown in my path right and left lately. I shall not be deterred, but it ain't gonna be easy.

As I've already complained, my knee is on the replacement "to-do" list this fall. Until then, I'll be dragging it behind me, bitching loudly. I think I might have pulled a little something in my neck lifting weights this morning. I think it might be a matter of not stretching enough, so I'm not overly concerned. However, what I am concerned about it how much more stretching and warming up I have to do before I can get down to business. Almost as long as the workout itself!!

I was at the Dermatologist the other day, and had several spots frozen. Nothing significant, thank goodness, but the spot I was actually worried about turned out to be nothing more than an "Old Age" spot. Now, the Dr. put it more politely than that, but I knew exactly what the inference was. Old Age spots be damned!! Of course pointing this one spot out led to the discovery of many, many more spots that prompted the, " You don't have to worry about this, it's a normal part of aging." comment. Ouch!

I looked this morning and found that my list of vitamins and Doctors now outnumber the number of friends on our Christmas Card list!! I had a plan, once upon a time. Hubby Dearest and I would slide gracefully into our dotage with dignity and all in one piece. I'm pretty sure HD is gonna succeed, but I'm sort of a question mark at this point. I can cope with body parts aging, and going to pot, but I get very concerned when my mind shows signs of slowing down.

Case in point: Grocery Day today. I park the car in about the same place.....far enough from the door to make myself walk a short distance. (So far, so good, huh?) I shop like pro, sticking mainly to the perimeter of the store. (Still ok, right?) Check out and pay. (Still hangin' in there.) Push the cart out to the car. Stand by the door and click my remote door thingy...nothing. Keep clicking, still nothing. Click, click, curse, curse, click, click. Well, dummy, now what? If I stay out in the heat much longer, my broccoli is gonna pre-cook. LIGHTBULB!!! This is not my car! Ye Gods! It is an identical version of my car, down to the extra cloth grocery bags on the back seat. My car is directly across from the car I'm trying to break into! As casually as I can muster at this point, I stroll over to my car and load 'er up, return the cart to the cart park, and make my getaway as quickly and quietly as possible. As I left I saw that this car had different tires than my car.....well, who the hell checks that???

But in thinking about this further, it occurs to me that I have an SUV with the license plate right there in front of me on the tailgate. I have a personalized plate and should have noticed that I was trying to load up the wrong tailgate!!! I can't begin to tell you how that affects my self esteem and my plan to be a really cool, hip and happenin' old lady. I've suffered a setback, but I'm bound and determined to keep pluggin' away. I am buying a book of more difficult crosswords right away!


  1. I could have written this post myself and I'm "only" forty. I was just complaining to a friend about a few age spots on my arms and I also tried to get in someone elses sliver Honda CRV today- Parked next to mine. I'm so glad they weren't walking out at the time! LOL Hang in there old lady :)

  2. I went to the Dr about 8 years ago concerned about a spot and he came right out and chuckled and said nope, just an age spot :) Makes me smile now!!
    Welcome to the club!

  3. LOL At least you didn't get in and try to start it, cursing loudly when the key wouldn't fit in the ignition. Yep, I did. :)

    The really bad part was I had already unloaded my groceries and had taken the cart to the cart caddy. Had to reverse the process and quickly, so that the true owners didn't come back and call the cops on me!

  4. Setbacks - the wrong car - been there.....done that..... yikes!

  5. Grace and being graceful (as you march into old age) is all mental I believe!!!!

    Ok ok ok, the car thing has NOTHING to do with age....NOTHING. OK, if it does...then I'm in SERIOUS trouble at age 37 because I've been having problems with the car thing for years already!

  6. I blame the other guy. He shouldn't try to copy your coolness by imitating your choice of car. Clearly, it's all his fault :)


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