Not in a good way, either. I have found that when I sign up to follow my new blogging buddies, my picture is gone and has been replaced by a blank space and little red "X". I'm not even the real me anymore. How very sad. I had bragged several weeks ago about how my blogging experiences had not been marred by some of the same troubles others were having. I spoke too soon....I have been reduced to a plain old, boring "X" in the blogosphere. I've tried changing pictures, but no luck. So now when you see a big white blank spot and a little red "X" in your followers list, don't worry it's only me lurking out here in cyberspace.
I am also in the midst of a caloric melt down. I just plain goofed off and am quite sure I'll be paying the price on Wednesday. I also have to admit that even tho' I had thought about giving up the Weigh In Wednesday, I simply am too reliant on what that scale tells me. I know, I know, everyone else is giving up the scale in favor of a more self observant type of measuring stick. I'm too old to learn new tricks, I think. I'm a numbers person, and only weighing once a week is about all the "freedom" I can allow myself. I do notice clothes hanging a bit loose, and belts being cinched up one extra notch, but I still have to know the number. This Wednesday may very well crush me by giving me that information, but I'm dialed in on it anyway. This past week, as part of my debauchery, I did not use my food diary every day either. THAT is not a good thing, and I'm sure I'll be paying for it.
These admissions are not a sign I've given up, it's merely a sign I need to readjust my thinking and my "doing". I'm back in the lead in the Great Cardio Challenge, but for whatever reason, I'm not all charged up about it. I'm still trying to watch what I am eating, but not writing it down seemed ok to do for a while. Looking back, it was exactly the WRONG thing to do. I need the visual of the numbers looking me straight in the face. So.....I am now picking myself up and dusting myself off and resuming my journey, hopefully with renewed vigor.