Apologies to Otis Redding and his "Sittin' On The Dock Of The Bay", but it is once again dark and gloomy here. I feel as tho' I'm living in a version of "Wuthering Heights". The lack of sunshine is taking its toll on my psyche.
I had another post all thought out, then last night when I was still awake until 3 a.m. I began running other post titles thru my mind. All of them related to the fact that it has been depressing weather around here for way too long. "My Mojo is No-Go" was my favorite blog title from last night. Others that wouldn't have made the cut were, "The Sun Never Rises", " A Little Gin with your ICE, Madam?", "This is your body speaking, what the hell are you doing?", "Is Gray really a color?" All of this dull, dreary, brown, gray, cloudy, cold, snowy, icy and just generally crappy weather has left me feeling simply unwilling to get my act together in the health and happiness department.
I exercise just a dab each day, so I can say I did something. I've been cheating on the foods I eat....writing down that which I remember, forgetting (kinda) what I don't want to admit to. I don't eat stuff that is really bad, I just eat a bit more than is reasonable. It has been just awful. I feel lousy. I am also getting tired of hearing my little inner voice telling me to quit being such a baby, suck it up, and get on the ball. I have told myself I have to quit using my bad knee as an excuse to do less and less every day. I had hoped that last night's epiphany would find me all revved up this morning, but so far, not so much. I'm waiting for my next "Ah Ha?" moment to occur. The most depressing part of the whole thing is that it has been almost 1 year since I began my blog and I've really made progress, then shot myself in the foot and began all over again.....twice!!
Generally speaking, I am one of the most stubborn people on the planet. I can do anything I set my mind to. Five years ago I gave up smoking, gained 40# and knew I could get that weight off when I set my mind to it. Soooooo, the big question is, "When the hell am I gonna set my mind to it?" After my beginning efforts last year, I lost 16 pounds. Then I fell off the wagon when I hit a plateau. A few weeks ago I got back on the wagon and lost 9 pounds which were part of the original 16 I'd lost earlier. This week, I stayed even with the weigh in numbers on Wednesday. Today, I stepped on the scales (even tho' I normally would wait until next Wed.) because I felt go guilty about yesterday's assault on the pantry. It would seem that I've added back 3# in one day!!! Is that really possible? Given my activity level at the moment, I'd say yes.
So, I'm undergoing a crisis of conscience. Can I make myself straighten up and fly right? I am certainly hoping so. I'm happy to say that we are eating healthier and doing well, food wise. Hubby Dearest has stayed with his 3 day cardio routine, but I am floundering. Any ideas? I'd welcome a swift kick in my butt to get this balloon off the ground again.